Hey there…
My name is Jay Titus (Not Jay Walker shown above, but we will get to that in a minute). I am a veteran of the U.S. Army, husband, father, and full stack engineer.
Don’t know what a full-stack engineer is? I don’t blame you. We are usually too busy to write anything down. It simply means that I’ve worked professionally across the entire stack including Networking, Infrastructure, Development, Security and most recently launched an AI driven startup Black Hole Registry.
Why am I telling you this? Well… it’s important to understand what my writing here will be like. It will likely be a lot of science, tech, and musings on artificial intelligence, but will also delve into politics, history, and possibly even some short stories. Almost everything will have a healthy dose of humor and sarcasm.
If you like a bit of everything and can handle some dark humor, then this eclectic mix might be for you. If not, have fun storming the internet somewhere else.
Why Call It “The Jay Hole”?
Good question. It can have a negative connotation, but it really comes down to my sense of humor. I got the idea when watching “The Good Place”, and Jason invited everyone to his Bud Hole to hangout. I like layered language.
Disclosures
I work for Microsoft as my day job. Nothing I write here represents Microsoft in any way. This is my personal, creative space. If I am commenting on a Microsoft product or a competitor, I will disclose it along with any potential relevance. This may come up as my personal life and experience has some overlap with what I do.
No AI - Mostly
I’m not going to use any foundational AI model to write any of my posts. However, I am in the process of cloning myself to spice up my marriage of 26 years. Some of that may be the subject of posts, and who knows, if it gets good enough, I might use it. I will disclose that as well unless it decides to go off and do it on its own.
Language
I use “bad” language in my personal writing (whatever the *#&$ that means). If you can’t handle that then %$&$ off somewhere else. This is likely the last Q-Bert warning you will see.
I did say this was a Manifesto…
To start this off right, I need something to complain about and boy do I have something that really needs legislation or removal of legislation to be more precise.
I’m a real Jay. That’s right, I’m not some fake-ass Jason, Jacob, Jesse, or James that call themselves Jay. My middle name isn’t Jay and I just use it to confuse people. I’ve been a Jay since the day I was born. I’ve come to like my name, but historically Jays haven’t had it easy.
You might not know what I’m talking about, and that’s ok. You probably aren’t a Jay, and I cannot expect you to know our plight unless you were a Jay before the 1990s.
The History of Jay
In western culture, Jay is derived from Late Latin gaius meaning "to rejoice". Jay can also mean "a noisy, brightly colored bird." Is that what the Blue Jay is really known for though? No, a Jay is often known for stealing and eating eggs and nestlings of other birds and pestering predators such as house cats, owls, and red-tailed hawks.
That “to rejoice” part disappeared quickly. In Old French jay(e) or gai, which may have referred to a showy person, a simpleton, an idle chatterer, or a thief.
Unfortunately, the negative connotations to being a Jay didn’t stop there. In the early 1800s and early 1900s it was applied to the term Jay-Driver. This term originated with carriage drivers who drove on the wrong side of the road. From there it was a short flight to the term Jay Walker.
With automobiles taking over the roads we had to get rid of those big dumb Jays. They were causing far too much damage to new cars! Fortunately, the automobile industry lobby came to the rescue and started a publicity campaign to formally and legally cement Jays as rubes, hillbillies, and idiots under the law.
This is still true today. Everyone knows the term Jaywalking, and it’s a safe bet that you and every single adult has broken this law. Yep, walking as a Jay is a crime. It is used to raise revenue and oppress people (especially minorities) when police can’t find another excuse to stop-and-frisk.
The Struggle for Jay Rights
Our struggle has been going on for a very long time. The history above gives you the origin story, but the history books don’t teach anyone about the 1980s. It’s probably some made up book banning DEI bullshit, so I’ll explain. Like today under the Trump administration, the 80s were horrible time for anyone who didn’t fit a particular mold. It was the height of AIDS pandemic and the Satanic Panic. Being gay was about the worst thing you could be. This belief system is the likely origin story of Gen X MAGATS (Make America Great Again Trump Supporters).
As a young heterosexual Jay-kid I did not know that having a name that rhymed with gay would conscript me into the struggle for Gay Rights, but it did. There might be some Jays out there that avoided this, but I was not like the other kids, and if I’m honest, I may have fit the gay stereotype pretty darn well.
I was a creative type, into computers, video games, art, and Dungeons and Dragons. When I was “sports playing age” the differences really started to show. Sure, I liked sports well enough, but my D&D stats gave me a Dexterity of 4, and my “parents” did not accept my lifestyle at all. After seeing me perform a few times, they immediately forced me into ballet. It didn’t work. Jay conversion therapy never does.
The good news is that it forged me into an early life ally. It was tough at first but after a while I embraced it. I added in piano and proudly embraced the Jay lifestyle of the 80s & 90s. It taught me some good lessons about respecting others and that you can also use your differences to scare the absolute shit out of so called “real men”. That’s right, LGBTQ+ community saved my ass more than once. If you are in a tough situation, pull out an old line from the original Roadhouse movie with Patrick Swayze and yell “I used to fuck guys like you in prison.” Give ‘em a big smile and throw in a little thrusting motion. I think you will find that there is literally nothing these dipshit “real men of the manosphere” are more afraid of than a gay man beating the shit out of them. Today, I am a proud member of the LGBTQ+J community.
How to Jay
If you are a “Natural Jay” without fake-ass implants, then it’s time to stand up and stop the government from profiting off the back of our good first name. It has taken a lot of work between Jay-Z, LL Cool J, and me to make Jay cool again. Don’t let our hard work go to waste!
So, if you are a not a “Natural Jay” and I meet you I may ask “Are you a Real Jay?” and ask to see some identification. If you aren’t, you are getting a ticket for Jaywalking.
All “natural” Jay’s have the power to create honorary Jays. If you meet anyone that has a really bad name with J in it then you can make an exception. Jaythan is a really good example of this. That is a rough name, and they need protection.
‘s
I'm disappointed in you Jay. You are using your mothers Last Name and not your real last name, which is ATKINS, not TITUS. While I enjoyed your brief sojourn into the history of the name "Jay", I wondered if you took the time to research the name of Atkins. There's a great history there, too. My name, (your father) Thomas Atkins , is in the dictionary and one of your ancestors was high in the aristocracy of old England, just to mention a couple. You have your reasons for this, but it is important to remember who you are and be proud of your heritage. God bless you.